TURN PAIN INTO ACTION

We do best when we collaborate!

Gail Oliver Cambridge | September 2025

How each of us experiences pain differs. Naturally, we feel our own most intensely. However, we also feel the torment of others as they go through trials. We empathize. We see images from far-away places of war-torn towns, people fleeing as they run for shelter, and the most painful — starving and frightened children whose parents and siblings are absent and who may be dead.

Other tribulations around the world may not be at the forefront, but they are nevertheless happening. Dictators create severe laws to curb democracy and gain wealth while depriving others. Gangs and extremist groups cause havoc as they carry out attacks, kidnap, rob, and kill people. It is often the most vulnerable populations who are so adversely affected by such tyranny and lawlessness, certainly not the families, friends, and associates of the instigators.

Here in the United States, we are not immune to such anguish. Every day there are attacks on diversity, equity, and inclusion; accessible and affordable health care; Medicaid and other federal aid programs; vaccine access…the list goes on. The rich have the resources, and the poor suffer from lack thereof. What can we do for the good of our collective mental health?

Remember these blogs are my love notes to you, so your personal wellness is important to me. I know we all donate and volunteer in our respective areas and that is very good. When we are in a position to effect positive change, I believe we should take one bite at a time. We should look at the concern in front of us and deal with that situation. We shouldn’t take on the burden of the large insurmountable issues as that is overwhelming and we may be tempted to give up.

In taking steps to find a solution to any problematic situation, we will most likely have to collaborate with the other side, which may not be easy but is often necessary as it’s all for the common good. We cannot operate in a vacuum but must act together to turn things around. We may carry emotional pain into these situations, but we cannot allow feelings of hatred, anger, despair, inadequacy, powerlessness, and the like to distract us. Rather than focus on our differences or on those things that are beyond our control, we must remind ourselves that we’re doing our best.

As I’ve discussed in a previous blog, it's imperative that we practice active listening when interacting with others, which will often get us to those moments of “Ah, so that’s what you mean,” “I now understand what you’re saying,” or “Okay, now I get it.”

We are united in our mission to confront the problem at hand and to promote the well-being of others. Therefore, we must acknowledge and face anything that might hamper us, always being cognizant of the need to help not harm others. In the process, let’s pray for assistance in keeping our optimism and in following our inner light so that with compassion we can achieve a productive outcome for those who need it most.