SECOND FIDDLE

Gail Oliver Cambridge | February 2025
Who wants to play second fiddle? I’m sure the answer is no one. Let’s take a look at what the Apostle Paul said, “Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle" (Romans 12:9-10 MSG). What say you now?
Playing second fiddle is an idiom that means to be in a subordinate role or to be less important than someone else. Whether in a romantic or platonic relationship, those words can elicit feelings of betrayal and of being less than, an emotional toll. Jealousy can raise its ugly head if a threat to the ranking is perceived. The Apostle Paul wanted us to consider the expression in a different way.
At some point, we’ve all willingly played second fiddle in the manner the Apostle Paul meant in that we were supportive of our partners, bosses, families, and friends. The effort we put forth was important to benefit the person and overall success of the situation. This position may have been temporary, but we were satisfied being in our lane as we thrived towards the goal. We were loyal and performed our tasks enthusiastically. We had a positive impact on the outcome and may not have received any recognition but that wasn’t the objective.
Being in a secondary role does not negate aspirations of becoming a leader. However, leadership involves serious responsibility, and the bar is set high to produce favorable results. Some of us have the propensity to lead and others to assist. We should represent either role to the best of our ability.
Playing second fiddle is being humble and giving grace as we serve. It comes from a place of love. We embrace our part and let it flow from there. Nevertheless, in doing so we’re not to be taken for granted, disrespected, or have our feelings and opinions ignored. Therein lies the point—we all matter!
We cannot all be first violinists. Leonard Bernstein, an American composer and conductor, was asked what the most difficult instrument in the orchestra was, and he replied, “The second fiddle. I can get plenty of first violinists, but to find someone who can play the second fiddle with enthusiasm – that's a problem; and if we have no second fiddle, we have no harmony."
Well written, Gail! Keep up the good work!